Calaidescope World

A Foreigner's Guide to Pinoy Conversation

(I got this from Bianca today. Aliw!)

1. Achuchuchu (A-chu-chu-chu). This refers to the pointless insincerities being said during long, involved conversations about nothing at all.

2. Ano (A-noh). The all-around, all-purpose word for everything.
(1) Pronoun in interrogation: Ano? (What)
(2) Noun: Where is your ano? (Where is yourfather/mother/dead-uncle's-second-cousin)
(3) Verb: Anuhin this. (Paint/kill/maim/castrate this.)
(4) Adjective: This is so ano. (This is so pretty/big/astounding.)
(5) Interjection: Ano! (What the hell!)

3. Checheboreche (Che-che-boh-re-che). Same as achuchuchu. It is interesting to ponder on the reason why there are so many words in theFilipino language that beautifully describe meaningless chatter.

4. Epal (Eh-pal). An individual who believes he is God.

5. Gigil (gee-gil). An uncontrollable desire to bite something.

6. Hipon (Hee-pon). Literally "shrimp," whose body is eaten while its head is thrown away, this refers to a person whose body is to die for and whose face looks like it belongs to the dead.

7. Kikay (kee-kay). Refers to individuals who carry a brush, hand wash, moisturizer, lip-gloss and various other facial enhancements in a case (aptly called a kikay kit) inside her bag. Recent inspections of various backpacks have led to the conclusion it is not a purely female trait. This breed cannot resist checking themselves out on mirrors, glass windows, bread knives, sidewalk puddles and plastic-covered notebooks.

8. Kaek-ekan (Ka-ek-e-kahn). Same as achuchuchu and chechebureche.

9. Kilig (keel-leg). A rush of excitement due to the actions, presence or even mention of he whom you see as the future father of yourchildren.

10. Indyanero (In-jan-neh-ro). An individual who fails to appear at an appointment without prior warning. Not to be confused with individuals who appear according to Filipino time (approximately 10 minutes before the meeting ends).

11. Japorms (Jah-porms). Describes an individual dressed differentlyfrom the usual (typically involves clothes that have been laundered and pant legs of roughly the same length).

12. Lagot (Lah-got). A prophecy of evil things to come.

13. Para (Pah-rah). A term that informs the driver of a jeep to stop and pause (usually in the middle of the road) as the individual speaking intends to leave the vehicle. Dangerous for individuals as drivers seem to believe having one foot in the air is all that is necessary for descent.

14. Takusa (Ta-kuh-sa). Derived from takot sa asawa (afraid of wife), this is a term used to describe the silent (very silent) minority of males married to feminine reincarnations of Hitler.

15. Torpe (tore-peh). A gentleman who is desperately attracted to a female yet by some strange compulsion is reduced to a frozen mound of stuttering male whenever that female is near.

Armed with this list and a smile, you will be sure to make the proper impression not just on your new relations, but on your loved one a swell.

posted by Calai @ 8:03 PM